Thursday, 6 November 2014

Do Experts not Imbibe?

Is it true that experts don't imbibe?
That they sniff and sip and spit?
Well, tell me what's the good of it?

I'll tell you now what I have found -
And I've been many years around -
You never really know a wine
Till glasses you've had eight or nine.

The first is rather interesting.
The second is where begins the testing.
The third one I would call "explore"
And the fourth, "Yes, yes; I will have more."

When I come over to your house,
Yes, yes, get the glasses out;
But do not  count it by the glass:
A bottle each, or it's alas!

A so-called expert would have a sip,
But I will have the whole of it.
And if the choice is size or quality,
Then plonk wins every time for quantity.

Three glasses, and I'll say a poem,
And twenty more before I go home.
I'll even do many lines by Heaney,
Corrupted with lascivious meaning.

Here is how a wine is judged:
Does it the joyful spirit move?
Does it the company ignite
To laugh and sing all through the night?

If you wonder, "Is this good for me?"
Don't ask a qualified MD.
Ask a jovial gentleman
Who's been and done and still goes on.

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